Call me out/ Voice practice post for tacomeme

[tacomeme]

I've beaten Birthright, most of Conquest and am spoiled on all major plot points. Also open to AUs- note route or setting in starters please!

Threads will have Spoilers for all three routes, so please be aware!

Comments

[brynwieldr]

Their logic, and I promise you this is what they were thinking: the last time we were all together, there was a lot of sex. There will probably be a lot of sex this time. Surely raunchy homosexual porn will be welcome! I swear, that child is more interested in matchmaking than any actual matchmaker.

[tacomeme]

...well I can't completely argue their point.

[Thank the gods for the deeprealms or else half their army would be laid up with sudden pregnancies at any one time]

Still, it's a strange choice.

[He reaches out and takes the book, flipping through it]

There's not even any art in this.

[brynwieldr]

[Leo is so red and takes it back, flipping to a passage and reading it aloud:]

"--being at the mercy of his slave sent jolts of guilt, shame, and pleasure down Reynard's spine. Tied up like this, facing the mirror, he couldn't look away. A dirty rag tied over his mouth to keep him from crying out while Kris pounded into him at a speed that was tearing Reynard apart, Kris's thick cock making him wish he had never been caught with those whores."

[A look (still blushing)]

Nohrian romance writers don't need art.

[tacomeme]

[He's fire red at that, eyes huge.]

Somehow I'm not surprised you knew exactly what page to flip to in order to prove your point.

[There's no judgement in that- after all, that was the point of a shunga, and they were supposed to tailor to any taste and whim.]

[brynwieldr]

Oh, I could have picked worse. There's an entire chapter where they're involved in an orgy, and of course the arc where, in order to prove his worth as a hero, Reynard is forced to allow Kris to perform the Seven Demonic Acts with him--or, as Niles put it, become Kris's bitch in front of hundreds of people doing things even he'd side-eye. That one was tame. In the first chapter.

[So red. So, so red]

[tacomeme]

[His face is in his hands at that point, half mortified, half laughing because that is pretty over the top.]

I'm starting to wonder if you're pulling my leg.

[brynwieldr]

[Leo opens the table of contents to show Takumi.

Each chapter title is accompanied by a very descriptive summary of what kinky sex acts the heroes perform in it.]

I never lie about books. Even raunchy erotica.

[tacomeme]

Something I've noticed while catching up on some of the books you've sent me- your writers sure do love stories about nobility in peril.

[He rests his chin in his hand, smirking a little]

[brynwieldr]

[Leo rolls his eyes a little]

Nohrian literature can be divided into three genres: nobility in peril and saved by nobility, nobility in peril and not saved, and children's stories.

[Still, he's blushing. He's not lying, but Leo happens to really like that second category. A lot]

[tacomeme]

Heh, maybe I should have just stuck with the military strategy and philosophy books.

[Even though he looks interested]

I'm guessing roving ronin were the bad guys in those a lot.

[brynwieldr]

For a certain definition of "bad guys". There is a huge section of the population with what can only be described as a Hoshido kink.

[tacomeme]

[He sputters slightly, but can't say he's surprised. Being 'the enemy' meant they showed up in stories a lot, he's sure. And that just feeds into this kind of thing]

...I'll admit, that goes both ways. If you know where to look.

[brynwieldr]

Not surprising, especially given a dark mage's traditional attire.

[tacomeme]

Oh gods, don't remind me.

[He's seen way too much of Odin's... everything.]

[brynwieldr]

[Leo chuckles a little bit before his curiosity overcomes him]

Do your samurai really carry vulgar art with them?

[tacomeme]

Some do, yeah. It's supposed to be good luck.

[brynwieldr]

Good luck to carry pornographic art. Huh.

[A pause and then:]

Do you?

[tacomeme]

[He gives him a look]

I have. Though I'm not a samurai.

[He knows how to use a sword better then most, and has his own armor- but it's mostly ceremonial- give him his yumi and light weight clothing any day in an actual battle]

[brynwieldr]

Can I see? I shared Nohrian erotica, after all.

[tacomeme]

[He laughs, good-naturedly]

If you really want. I'm afraid you might find it lacking after that.

[He gestures to the book before digging around in his hip pouch. He offers him the woodart scroll.

The art is exaggerated but still oddly lovely in it's way- and *very* detailed. The writing has no set up. No narrative to speak of, just going straight to describing the action shown... with a lot of flower metaphors and the like. But still, it's obviously not to HIDE what's happening more then just artistic choice. Something to be used quickly while on the march, not enjoyed in the privacy of your home when you have time to spend]

[brynwieldr]

[Leo chokes on air when he sees it. That is...wow. Nohrian depictions of nudity are much more artistic, pure or sensual as opposed to...this.

Leo kind of likes this.

He's blushing a little because...ahem. That is a picture he is very interested in and he did have some wine before escaping.]

Put your artists with our writers and we would have very lucrative industry on our hands.

[tacomeme]

[Leo isn't alone, Takumi red and shifting here and there, wondering if coming in here was a bad idea. Still, he can't help laughing]

Well you can be the one to suggest that at the next trade meeting. I'm sure your brother would be all for it.

[...though honestly, as hilarious as the image of Xander reacting to that is, he's pretty sure Ryoma would legit think it was a good idea]

[brynwieldr]

...he would, though. He would be entirely serious about it being a possible cultural exchange. Sex is universal, after all, and either you like it or you don't.

[tacomeme]

...Ryoma would too, and that's the scary thing. We'll end up with Nohrian nobility thinking they are about to be kidnapped for raunchy adventures every time someone crosses the border.

[brynwieldr]

...maybe we won't suggest it.

[He sighs]

Maybe we should just work on a...tourism committee or something. It's not like it's hard to find the red flag districts anyway.

[How Nohrians point out where the hookers are]